48-laws-of-power.md

48 laws of power

Preface

• The author argues about the importance of chasing power through secrecy, strategy and deceit rather than honesty and openness.
• Look at the mistakes you've made in the past through these 48 laws and commit not to repeat them again.
• My thoughts:
  • "No one wants less power; everyone wants more." The book makes broad claims about human nature which are demonstrably false. But I think it's this kind of writing can have the most impact on people-- it seems a great combination of stories are arguments to change people's opinions.
  • Reading the books reminds me of the cobra kai series. "Strike first, strike hard, no mercy" approach more than "use only for self defense approach"

Law 1: Never outshine the master

• Make your masters appear and feel smarter than they are. Make them feel superior. Pleasing them by displaying your talents might accomplish the opposite.
• How to actually impress superiors?
  • Discreet flattery. Act naive and make it seem that you need his help. Let him show off what he knows.
  • Credit. Ascribe your ideas to him, make it that your idea is just an echo of his.
  • Tone down. If you're better than your superior at wit, social, generosity, tone is down. By letting other people outshine, you remain in control-- without being a victim of their insecurity.
• Thoughts:
  • Really? How does this play out in a supervisor situation? How does this play out in an interview situation?
  • Could discreet flattery backfire? "this guys is too dumb." Could credit backfire? He takes first author on the paper.
  • All of us have a self image. Me: ML researcher. Stoic. Disciplined.
  • Discussion with Amar:
    • your success = his success? that might change the dynamics a little. But if you're directly working with you boss's boss, you need to be more careful.
    • Look at the mean! Statements apply to the mean of the distribution, not everyone. There are always outliers.
    • more applicable to young bosses
• Questions:
  • When have I violated this law in the past?
  • Where can I apply this law in my life?

Law 2: use enemies, don't trust friends

• It is sometimes better to keep enemies, than converting to friends, because they will stop us from getting lazy. You cannot grow stronger without an enemy. If you want to motivate a team, use an enemy.
• Use friends to do your dirty work, and use them as scapegoats if something goes off.
• Problem with friends:
  • You don't know them well. They hide bad qualities and show you only the good side.
  • Friends are rarely the best fit of partners.
  • They feel more envy and ingratitude.
• Turning enemies to friends:
  • Show them love. Show them that even though they hate you, you help them out when things get hard.
  • Help your enemies when they are in grave danger, and they will do anything for you.
• Thoughts:
  • What about people like Khabib? I love him because he train with his friends and helps them out.
  • Amar: using them as business partners
  • you give friends things easily, thye values less

Law 3: conceal your intentions

• Especially when you love someone, giving that information up early only make them disinterested in you.
• Why do we do it?
  • We want to be felt understood by other people.
  • It is hard to be strategic about this. People have the illusion that being an open book is the key.
• Why conceal? If you're open and honest, you're too predictable. No one will respect / fear you.
• "Seem to want something you're indifferent to throw the enemy off guard, talk endlessly about your goals and desires"
• Be nice to your enemies as because your trust puts you in a better position to land a devastating blow. If you want to defeat someone, seem innocuous so that they let their guard down.
• How to conceal?
  • Don't be an actor. Just be bland.
  • Use patterns to your advantage. Seem like someone who acts in accordance to patterns / mental models of your enemy. Violate suddenly.
  • Blend in with people. Don't be recognized. Violate suddenly.
• Thoughts:
  • CAll with Amar
    • "I like you" -- if you get something, things change. you've acheieved it, poeple stop working. do it back and forth
    • "people pick new stuff to solve always"
    • give poeple things slowly
• Questions:
  • Where can I apply this law in my life?
    • Maybe I shouldn't care too strongly about "being understood" or giving others an accurate image of who I am. That is a advantage if you ever get in a competition with them.
    • Negotiations. Sellings.
    • Everyone wants to feel imporatnt. Don't

Law 4: say less than necessary

• why?
  • This will make others ponder more about why we said whatever we said. Which adds to your power.
  • The less you tout your work, the more people talk about it.
  • Reduces the risk of saying something bad and embarrassing yourself.
  • Sarcasm rarely helps; the momentary satisfaction will be outweighed by the price you pay.
• Reversal: you can talk more to look like a fool, that you can use for deception.
• Applying this to life:
  • Never try too hard to convince anyone in conversations. Try to use as few words as possible. If it's not working, go back to the drawing board. Spend time thinking about it in private and be ready for next time. (remember your failed conversations, eg. Nishanth -- if others make good points, immediately acknowledge and tell them you need to spend more time thinking about it)
  • In a group discussion, speak less. Be prepared for the opportunity you get to speak and be brief and say something very interesting. Just intrigue people, and let them give you the space to speak. Don't take over.

Law 5: guard your reputation

• how?
  • when you don't have a reputation, attack the reputation of the competitors by sowing doubts about them.
  • when you have reputation, don't outright straightly attack; do something humorous light-hearted mocking; ridicule with satire, never go all out.
  • establish a strong reputation, predict attacks on it. never appear desperate in your self-defense. If you reputation is marred, collaborate with people will good reputation.
• questions
  • but this seems in direct conflict of stoicism. "why insults hurt":
    • we insult to win a game of social hierarchy / power. stop playing the game, if someone insults "no response, or self deprecating humor".
    • to have reputation is to impress people who have different values from yours, do you even want to impress them?

Law 6: Gain attention

• What's unseen counts for nothing. Stand out, don't get lost in the crowd. Even if it's controversial -- better to be slandered and attacked than ignored.